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Page A22 JUNE 2017 FUNERAL HOME & CEMETERY NEWS S ec t i on A
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By Todd Van Beck
Time
The American culture measures much of what we do in terms
of time. Our cultural slang is resplendent with sayings concern-
ing time: “A stitch in time saves nine” (whatever that means?);
“Time waits for no one”; “Time is money.” Time, how it is used
or abused, is an important factor in the funeral interview. These
days quick/fast time is ingrained in the American psyche. If a
meal at McDonalds takes too long people become impatient,
annoyed, or angry, while some simply march out and go else-
where.
I am not suggesting ordering at McDonalds is on the same lev-
el as the funeral interview, but I am saying people will care for
their dead in a consistent manner with how they live their lives.
If people expect fast food in fast time the probability is high that
they will march into the funeral/cemetery office with the same
expectation.
When we schedule a funeral interview for ten in the morning,
are we there and actually available promptly at ten? Promptness
is more than a matter of courtesy. The longer bereaved clients
are kept waiting the more they can start to wonder what else will
be mishandled? They might silently think they are of no impor-
tance to us. Or, wonder will we be fair and honest with them
since our action may have already set the stage for mistrust.
Experienced funeral directors or cemeterians know full well
that many times what the family’s imaginations can whip up
about us is amazingly unreal, but the important point to re-
member is that no matter how unfounded or exaggerated their
thoughts are, it is real to the person who imagined it!
If the appointment time can’t be kept provide an honest expla-
nation. Don’t include shop talk, such as, “Oh, I am sorry I am
running late, we just got back from a house call, and you know
how slow the police are in situations like this.” Your explanation
should be short and sweet, “My apologies to you, I was unavoid-
ably delayed, and I do hope you will forgive me.”
Time can be abused in other ways. For instance, someone
rushes into the funeral home/cemetery unannounced and insists
on seeing you at once. This can be a sticky wicket because many
times it is beyond our ability to drop everything and see them. I
have concluded that the death of another human being can in-
deed create a crisis, but I have discovered that what is a crisis to a
client should not toss the funeral home/cemetery into a crisis.
To be sure it is understandable that most any person would be
upset, nervous, grieved, and sad when they need our attention.
No funeral interview should take so long, that a walk-in cannot
be tended to in a reasonable time frame.
If there was no appointment made and you are serving another
client or on a service you are legitimately occupied. If the client
family must see you that day they will have to wait until you are
free or make an appointment to see someone else.
This is not a policy that is uncaring. On the contrary, were you
to see this family when preoccupied with other client concerns or
the very worse try to see them both simultaneously, you would
not treat either of them in the way they deserve. It is best to do ev-
erything we can to set up appointments, and stick to them, and if
we cannot see a walk-in or random appointment without taking
away from other set appointments we need to be firm but gentle
that a set appointment needs to be made.
Part of my love of funeral service is my memories of the ex-
tremely interesting funeral professionals whom I worked with in
the infancy of my career. I mentioned the high risk activities of
trying to serve two family clients simultaneously. I actually saw a
funeral director attempt this. I believe to this day that he thought
it would work, but in the end it was a colossal flop.
This director was a modern day Narcissus, self-absorbed, he ac-
tually thought that he could say whatever he wanted to anybody
and thought any death call required a response time which would
compare to an ambulance complete with high speed, siren and
lights.
One day a scheduled family arrived, and in they went with this
particular funeral director to make arrangements. About ten min-
utes later a second family arrived directly from the hospital where
their father had died. As I was explaining to the second family
that the funeral director was engaged, which they totally under-
stood, my associate came flying out of the arrangement office,
saw the second family, froze in his tracks, and then plunged and
bungled into our conversation and told them that he would wait
on them immediately.
He took them into a second office, and the funeral arrange-
ment acrobatics began. The funeral home staff watched him run
from office to office like a lunatic. One staff member actually had
a stop watch and kept time. This odd and strange scrambling fu-
neral director got through it, but the truth is both families felt
rushed, and one even complained. I thought both should have
complained.
Even when confronted with the client complaint this funeral
director refused to admit that he had done a foolish and reckless
thing by being insensitive and disorganized about use of his pro-
fessional time.
Setting interview times, moving the funeral interview on with
gentle persistence has wisdom and will help solve a myriad of po-
tential difficulties. Sometimes boundaries must be clearly drawn,
as some people go on talking not realizing they are repeating
themselves. Some clients may not know how to end the interview,
get up, and leave. They may feel that the polite thing to do is sit
and await a signal from the funeral director that the interview is
over.
I do not mean that we should ever rush a client family. We
should make clear to them upfront the time available so that they
can orient themselves within it. I have no precise answer as to how
long an interview should be but as one veteran funeral director
said to me many years ago two considerations concerning inter-
viewing time need to be at least considered 1) we are not wasting
the family client’s time, and 2) the funeral interview has to come
to an end sometime.
If you must and are compelled to interview several client families
in one day, always allow a fewminutes between funeral interviews.
Otherwise you may, like I have done many times, in your mind,
keep on talking to family A while family B is sitting there. Family
B is entitled to your full attention.
Get family A off your mind before seeing family B. To do this
you may well need a few minutes to mull things over, note on
your work sheet what you promised family A you would look
into, or just sit back or take a walk around the funeral home
once to get ready for family B. Try it. It works. —TVB
Keys to
Service
Todd Van Beck is a person who has had a half-century love affair
with both funeral and cemetery service. He willingly admits that he is
no “expert!” but also quickly admits that there is nothing about this
work and life that he does not enjoy, and have intense interest in.
Todd says: “I have never done a day’s work in my life, it has all been
fun and interesting.” Todd has been an active writer and speaker
internationally for many decades covering most every topic that is
relevant to our profession. Mr. Van Beck grew up in Southwestern
Iowa, and declared at the young age of 5 years old that he would
become a funeral director when he grew up. He is still growing up,
still learning, still trying to make some kind or worthy contribution to
his beloved profession. Todd has operated funeral homes, cemeteries
and mortuary colleges, and confesses that he has been a vagabond
throughout his career, simply because he wanted to see the world.
Todd is the Director of Continuing Education for the John A. Gupton
College in Nashville, and his wife, Georgia, R.N., is a Clinical Director
for Alive Hospice also in Nashville.
Solar Rendering
Oak Hill Cemetery Awarded Arboretum
Accreditation; Unveils Solar Project
EVANSVILLE,IN—TheWilliamHalbrooks Arboretum at Oak
Hill Cemetery is proud to announce it has been awarded a
Level II Accreditation by The ArbNet Arboretum Accredi-
tation Program and The Morton Arboretum, for achieving
particular standards of professional practices deemed impor-
tant for arboreta and botanic gardens. The ArbNet Arbore-
tumAccreditation Program is the only global initiative to of-
ficially recognize arboreta at various levels of development,
capacity, and professionalism. The William Halbrooks Ar-
boretum at Oak Hill Cemetery is also now recognized as an
accredited arboretum in the Morton Register of Arboreta,
a database of the world’s arboreta and gardens dedicated to
woody plants.
Oak Hill Cemetery was founded in 1853 and has a 175-
acre footprint with over 70,000 interments within the City
of Evansville. The William Halbrooks Arboretum is named
after the facility’s third superintendent and was established in
2017 to provide a quiet and healing land-
scape for mourners while respecting the
history and dignity of those interred at the
cemetery. It promotes public awareness and
appreciation of urban greenspaces by pro-
viding a safe, serene and beautiful setting. A
core goal is to protect and cultivate existing
trees and woody shrubs, while augmenting
the historic landscape by selecting and ap-
propriately locating new acquisitions. Ad-
ditionally, the arboretum promotes gener-
al awareness and appreciation for trees and
landscaping through social media, publica-
tions and public events. There are over 120
individual tree species representing within
the arboretum.
“This is a tremendous accomplishment
that represents a team effort in achieving
the certification for our historic facility. This
represents the culmination of many hours
of labor put in by countless volunteers as
well as a generous grant from the South-
western Indiana Master Gardener Associa-
tion. Without each and every one of them,
we would not have reached this goal!” said
Chris Cooke, CCE Superintendent.
Oak Hill becomes home to city’s
first universal solar project bringing
renewable energy to residents
The City of Evansville also announced a
joint partnership with Vectren Energy De-
livery, to construct a two megawatt solar ar-
ray on undeveloped cemetery land that was
previously leased to a farmer. The solar farm
will consist of approximately 8,000 ground-
mounted fixed-tilt solar panels being placed
on 16 acres. The new lease is at a higher
rate than previously which will bring in
more revenue for the cemetery. Vectren will
own and operate the project and will main-
tain the area which lies near a state high-
way, resulting in time freed up for cemetery
staff to spend elsewhere on ground mainte-
nance. “The farm will also help to generate
power for over 300 homes in our city which
will provide our city with a greener foot-
print when it comes to the area’s power gen-
eration capacity and help to lower green-
house gas emissions needed in conventional
power generation,” said Cooke. The project
should be operational in 2018.