Less than two weeks ago the best one-eyed Bichon rescue I have ever known died in my arms and in that moment the pain of grief escaped me in uncontrollable bursts of tears. There was nothing my sister could do or say to make the pain less, and yet her presence is what gave me the strength to allow myself to express the pain that closed my throat and opened my heart to how much I will miss my furry little side kick and how lucky I am to love him.

  I say love because that did not end with Breezy’s death. I just wish love could take away the pain and bring my dog back. I miss my best furry friend snuggling up with me and how he would take my wrist in both his paws and hug my hand close to him. I wish he could gently tap my arm or leg with his paw to ask for my attention. I miss how he would go to the kitchen and then to his dish to let me know he was hungry and how he would lie flat at the door to let me know it was time to go out.

  There are no Breezy chirps and howls in my car on the way to work. No happy Breezy frenzy as he jumps from the back to the front to the back to the front squealing how happy he is to be driving up to my parents’ house. He is no longer my mom’s shadow or doing everything Breezy to let my sister know how much he wants to be with her. There are no more Breezy surprise cuddles and pet me attacks on the sofa. He no longer shows my dad how much he loves him by going outside for a walk when it is just the two of them. We have no more Breezy barking to announce that someone is entering, leaving, or sometimes just moving in the room, and he no longer gives everyone a kiss or a nuzzle goodbye at the end of the day. Breezy the dog is dead.

  Breezy Love, now that is alive. Every time I think of him, miss him, or remember his Breezy ways I know my love for him is not in the past. My love for Breezy did not die and his love for all of us did not die with his body either. As my sister Jacqui wrote to me: Breezy is now closer to me than ever…he is in my heart.

  Knowing Breezy’s love is alive does not take my pain away it just helps the pain hurt a little less. Having my sister take me in her arms did not take away my pain it gave me a way to release it sobs and all. There are no human words that can express how much I miss my dog and there are no words that can convey how much I love him.

  Breezy is now more than a dog. His death reminds me that grief is not something we get over. It is something we need to do. It is in feeling the sadness of loss that we begin to realize love cannot die and our hearts begin to heal.

  I hope that my writing about grieving Breezy is helping you see that there are no human words that can express how much your kindness helps people release and begin to heal the pain that their grief brings to them. I can only say thank you for continuing to do all that you can to provide the families you serve with the most perfect place to express their pain, share their memories, and begin to realize that the love they share with the one they mourn is not dead. I pray you know how amazing you are!