September 2020

Page A8 SEPTEMBER 2020 FUNERAL HOME & CEMETERY NEWS S ec t i on A Try it FREE Today! Pay Us ONLY If You Decide to KEP it! LoadaLone The Affordable Automated Mortuary Cargo System Designed & Built by a Funeral Director Our beautiful laminate surfaces make a passenger vehicle a dignified alternative to the expense of buying a hearse! 1-Person Loading with WATCH OUR VIDEOS ONLINE: www.LoadAlone.com Talk to inventor David Murphy (NYSFDA) (585) 330-5772 TM Now during COVID-19 you need the LoadAlone more than ever! • 1-person loading means fewer employees exposed to possible contamination during pickups & removals at morgues or homes. • Super-smooth Formica surface of the LoadAlone is quick & easy to disinfect of any contamination between removals. eCondolence.com and Shiva.com Release the First Virtual Gathering Platform for Wakes, Shivas and Memorials MIAMI,FL— eCondolence.com an d shi- va.com has released Virtual Gathering, the first of its kind online gathering tool that can be used for wakes, shivas, memorials and other gatherings that honor and re- member a loved one. eCondolence and shiva.com deliver con- sumers a complete end-of-life platform that includes online funeral arrangements, Viewnerals™, and virtual memorial gather- ings in addition to grief and aftercare ser- vices including concierge services, access to local caterers, bakeries, delis, sympathy bas- kets and other commemorative services. “eCondolence.com and shiva.com are the only one stop destinations where an individ- ual can coordinate every aspect of the end- of-life process online,” says Michael Schim- mel, CEO of eCondolence.com and shiva. com . “With the powerful Virtual Gather- ing tool, friends and family from all over the world can attend a Viewneral and also par- ticipate in a remote memorial further sup- porting their grieving family or friends.” The eCondolence.com and shiva.com pre-planning seminars, Arrangements, Viewneral™ Services and Virtual Gath- ering are part of a proprietary platform powered by Zoom. The easy-to-use plat- form contains enhanced features includ- ing a personalized web page displaying all the gathering and service details, a private link to the gathering that can be shared, aftercare preferences and a virtual guest book of attendees with their condolence messages for the grieving family, among other unique components. Recently, eCondolence.com and shi- va.com announced it now has more than 1,000 approved deli, bakery and catering vendors in its network that provide same day delivery. These approved vendors are located in 32 states and service more than 3,000 cities providing those that are griev- ing and their supporters, access to the country’s best deli, bakery and caterers. Schimmel adds, “The pandemic expedit- ed everything virtual as a necessity for con- sumers and our industry partners, but these services are here to stay helping to simplify the most difficult of times.” Further helping families and their sup- porters, eCondolence.com and shiva.com offer complimentary access to in depth critical information, educational guidance about religious and cultural customs, ap- propriate verbal and written condolence messages, and curated sympathy and com- memorative meals and gifts. Through a single custom dashboard fu- neral care professionals can provide fami- lies pre-need funeral planning, Arrange- ments, Viewnerals, Virtual Gatherings and at-need and aftercare services that are managed in a single location. The Funer- al Home Arrangement Center allows for simplified case management and relation- ship development through a funeral home branded profile found on eCondolence. com and shiva.com. As part of the extensive Sympathy Brands portfolio, eCondolence.com and shiva.com™ connect families and funer- al homes through the stages of planning, service, and aftercare with its consumer brands, proprietary Viewneral™ technolo- gy, and nationwide concierge services. The companies provide a modern approach to end-of-life matters. Sympathy Brands stra- tegic partners include best-in-class funeral homes, cemeteries, insurance companies, non-profits, bakeries and caterers to make planning and fulfillment supportive, con- venient and seamless. For more informa- tion, visi t www.eCondolence.com, www. shiva.com an d www.sympathybrands.com . By Linda Findlay Aftercare Bereaved parents often say that they are in a club that no one would ever want to join. They are acutely aware of their status as a bereaved parent and often times describe the feelings as a constant dark cloud hovering over head in a world where everybody knows that their child has died, yet nobody speaks about it. Parents long to hear their child’s name. They desperately need to make sure that their child will never be forgotten. Parents tend to need to talk about what happened to their child. They like to share memories and stories. Guess what, they need to do this for the rest of their lives. Unfortunately, they find that it is very difficult to continue to do these things. They feel that people begin to think there is something wrong with them if they continue to talk about the child. Those closest to the bereaved parents are often afraid to talk about the child. They worry that they may make the parent feel worse! When in fact, the opposite is true. We can never speak enough about a child who has died. I can share with you that I know many bereaved par- ents who are 10, 15, 20 years or more out from the loss of their child. A bereaved parent has needs that don’t change much as the years churn on. The bereaved parent who I talk to today, who lost a child 15 years ago, still longs to hear their child’s name spoken by others and to share stories. The grief is still there. Bereaved parents somehow pick up the pieces and find some version of a life. However, I can assure you, a parent’s grief for the loss of a child can be just as fresh and can be felt just as deep as the day the child died. This is a fact! How do we help? I believe that we can educate families about what bereaved parents need. I believe that we serve the needs of our families and our community when we make a solid effort to reach out to those who have a family members and close friend who has lost a child. Providing education and information to your community about the loss of a child can and will, in turn, result in bereaved par- ents receiving the support that they need for the long haul. We can create an awareness of the difficulty and aid those who do care, but don’t know what to say or do. The loss of a child, for most people, is the hardest of all losses. A parent’s grief will never fully be resolved. The grief that follows the death of a child causes the deepest of grief. Nobody can imagine what that might feel like, unless they too experience the loss of a child. As an aftercare provider, I consider it my most impor- tant work to make sure that a family who has lost a child is given every possible option to help them memorialize and honor their child, at the time of loss. Too many times I have been told about what the parents should have known about their options and what they wish they could go back and do differently. One of the most important immediate needs newly bereaved parents may have is to be able to spend as much time with their child as possible before the final disposition. If allowed, a parent should be offered the opportunity to help in caring for their de- ceased child while they are in your care. There most like- ly will be many thoughts and feelings that a parent will experience related to the circumstances of the death. All that had happened is completely out of the parent’s con- trol. As we all know, if we could save a child from death, we would go to the ends of the earth to do so. Once the death occurs, there are options that can help a parent feel as though they have more control over what they can ac- tually do for their child. It will never be enough, but, it can make a small difference. Linda Findlay is the founder of Mourning Discoveries, Grief Support Services. She is a 29-year career Aftercare Coordinator, a published author, and an advocate for bereaved families. She is the founder and co-creator of The Grief Cruises and managing partner with The International Grief Institute. Linda can be reached at 315-725-6132 or Lf6643@yahoo.com. Visit www.mourningdiscoveries.com, www.thegriefcruises.com or www.internationalgriefinstitute.com. FUNERAL HOME & CEMETERY NEWS www.nomispublications.com Monthly Columns online at How do we serve the needs of bereaved parents? One way, which is not often thought of, is to support those around the bereaved parents with education, re- sources and helpful information. It is helpful to have liter- ature and resources readily available and should be offered to those who show up! There have been many funeral homes who have hosted an annual workshop about how to support bereaved parents. Educating communities can have a lasting impact on how well bereaved parents are supported by those who care about them. There are sev- eral organizations who support bereaved parents. Con- tacting them and requesting information costs only your time. Most of these organizations will provide resources and information about any local support groups that may be available. Having updated information about these or- ganizations can go a long way in helping you to support bereaved parents and those who love and care about them. The Compassionate Friends offers more than 625 meeting locations around the country for bereaved par- ents, siblings, and grandparents to share and support each other in their grief. Many of these meeting have gone online to continue to support grieving parents. They have great resources on their website. Bereaved Parents USA states on their website: “We come together as Bereaved Parents of the USA to pro- vide a safe space where grieving families can connect, share our stories, and learn to rebuild our lives.” Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS) states on their web- site: “Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with you through the suffocating darkness of child- loss, guiding you to a place of hope, light and purpose.” These are just a few good resources that you can share. The bottom line is, parents need support and under- standing for the rest of their lives. We can help! This is the second in a series of articles that speak to the dif- ferent losses that families experience. I feel that it is impor- tant to be reminded of the specific aspects of each loss that a family may experience so we can better serve their needs. The Loss of a Child Windows Into Loss OL of Charity San Juan de Lagos OL of Guadalupe Saint Martin de Porres OL of Charity with Cuban Flag OL of Guadalupe Madonna Alta Gracia Saint Jude OL of Guadalupe Saint Barbara The Divine Child Jesus Saint Lazarus See the collection at www.cromoprayercards.com High Quality Prayer Cards from the Studios of Cromo NB Italy Economical and Cost Effective to Print at Your Premises We have a vast collection of prayer cards for many of the demographic communities you serve. ASK FOR CROMO PRAYER CARDS FROM YOUR FUNERAL SUPPLIES DISTRIBUTOR